News : January 14, 2009

Right up there with the greatest unsolved mysteries of the world (who’s the second gunman on the grassy knoll? Who shot J.R.? What happened to Steven Seagal’s career?) — the true identity of Top Gear’s The Stig has finally been revealed…

Sort of.

News of the World reports that the anonymous driver is a happily married man in his 30’s that lives a quiet life in a modest home, drives an average car and get this…was once afraid of driving.

According to the tabloid, the true identity of the superdriver was found in a leak within the Top Gear infrastructure. Senior BBC officials have confirmed that there was indeed a leak of info, but News of the World is cooperating with BBC officials who do not want the secrets of Top Gear’s driver revealed.

As much as I’d like to know the true identity of The Stig, it’s better left as a mystery — half of the fun is speculating on who’s behind the driver’s helmet and that’s something that should not be ruined by a British tabloid seeking a surge in circulation. As for my guess for who’s behind the helmet? I’m going with Steven Seagal. Seriously, what the hell happened to him?